“Soft YTA. You sound overwhelmed, and exhausted, and I feel for you – but you’ve made some poor decisions. Im not going to rip you apart here. But I am going to echo a lot of the advice you’ve already gotten,” one comment began. “Try opening up and being more transparent about how you’re feeling and how you’re struggling with your wife. Don’t tell her what you think she is doing. Don’t be accusatory. This conversation is about you and your needs. Ask her for her advice on how you two can make the situation better. Tackle the problem as a team.”
“Mild YTA. First, pregnancy is f—ing exhausting and comes with all kinds of aches and pains and nausea and tiredness and she’s having twins FFS. Cut her some slack. Second, I totally agree everyone needs to vent which is why this is a mild YTA. But choose your recipient wisely!” the person advised. “Complaining about your pregnant wife is something to do maybe to one very trusted close friend. Not a whole group! … It’s a bit disloyal to tell all your friends. Also, when she found out, Jesus, just apologise. I’d be pretty upset if I were her, and you just doubled down.”
Someone else pointed out that she’s doing her best and is pregnant with twins. “Your children. She’s probably doing her best at four months, is in lot of pain and really tired. You talking behind her back and venting to your friends is obviously going to upset her because well, she’s not the only one responsible for her situation and you made her feel like she was,” the person wrote. “She’s not doing ‘less than normal’. Every pregnancy is different, every woman is different. She’s doing what she can. If you’re tired, just open a window, breathe, take a 5 min break and come back to her. Enjoy this, because you won’t be able to take much breaks with twins!”